The Joy of Bus Duty

Matty clapping at Bus Duty!

Last week, Matty visited his elementary school in CT - we arrived just in time for him to assist with Bus Duty 🚌. (Arrival time was preplanned of course 😊).

He saw his former teachers - they marveled at his height, his low voice, and how in the eight years that have passed since he was a student there, he was still so joyful about his favorite things. Namely - keeping track of the busses and calling the students for dismissal in order.

Being back at my kids' elementary school brought back a lot of great memories - this school community was truly inclusive. Both of my kids made many friends there - their teachers were (and are) dedicated professionals who promoted acceptance and inclusion everyday.  

I recall third grade as the year when Matty's differences were felt deeply. As I sat at his desk for back to school night, his teacher told the parents to take out their child's writing notebook and read some entries as we were getting settled. I heard giggles from the parents sitting nearby as they enjoyed reading the cute entires made by their children. I willed my tears to stay inside until I got to my car. Matty's notebook was empty. He couldn't write with a pencil (only on a keyboard). Third grade was the year that his educational gap widened to new depths. 

His third grade peers were curious about their friend, Matthew. Why was he going to speech, OT and PT? Back in the younger grades, they were invited to go with him once in a while to these services as a peer role model. In third grade, it's not as easy to leave the classroom during instruction - so they no longer were invited to go along. 

Matty and his friends at field day in 4th grade. 

It was around this time that I started writing my book series, Little Big Sister. I knew I wanted the book to be written at the third grade level for readability and content because that's the year I realized his peers had some questions and were ready for answers. 

Last week during bus duty, Matthew even noticed that one of the busses was missing from the line up. He still remembered the order of the busses way back from third grade when he loved earning the privilege of looking out the window to watch the bus dismissal process. I pictured him earning this privilege and choosing a friend to watch with him. Acceptance and inclusion at its best.

I admire the way his mind works!

Matty with some of his besties from elementary school.  

Autism Belongs Everywhere

Matty had an opportunity to be a reader at our church service last weekend.  

The boy who they told us might never speak.

He was a leader to all and showed what's possible. He did it his way and was appreciated and accepted for being himself. Out in the real world.  

When Matty was a younger child, I struggled with wondering if his school placement should be a typical school or a specialized school for students with disabilities. *

A friend who's son was a few years older than Matty challenged me with her view.

She said - when our kids become adults, will there be a specialized grocery store for them? A special time for them to be at the movie theater or restaurants? As parents, should we be expected to only bring our kids out into the world during designated times? 

OR

Imagine a world where our kids and loved ones with disabilities belong in the grocery store, the movie theater, restaurants and the world -  at all times - just like anyone else.  

This vision spoke to me back then and still speaks to me now. 

I encourage families like ours to continue showing the world what's possible. 

Autism belongs in every space and community.  

Autism belongs everywhere. 💙💙

* Written with respect for families who send their child to a specialized school because educationally or locationally, that's what makes the most sense for their child.